Okay, ladies. I couldn’t help myself. Women complain and carry on about sex during pregnancy: they either love it or they HATE it and just suck it up and try to endure it.
Well, here is a short list of things that have really helped me and Mister (our sixth child is due to arrive in May):
- Morning sickness can really ruin the first three months. Intercourse? Ha! Blowjob? That’s hilarious – when you can hardly brush your teeth without gagging. Ladies, a simple solution to morning sickness (of the morning variety) is popcorn. Keep dry popcorn by your bedside; munch on it. Try saltines, too. Whatever helps you. Popcorn was my thing. If you find that you have “morning” sickness all night long (like me), try my Midwife’s trick: three grapes every hour, on the hour. Three green grapes. Works like a charm, and then you at least have enough relief to love your husband at night (if not in the morning). Ginger root tea helps nausea, too. Warning: too much and you’ll have the runs…
- Hone your hand-job skills. Yet another good use for Virgin COCONUT OIL. Same for blow-jobs, ladies. If you absolutely cannot fathom intercourse…these are great options, even with a dry mouth.
- Invest in some pure Almond oil. You can get it at the health food store. Use it for perineal massage, because not only will this help you when you are pushing your baby into the world, but it will do wonders for your comfort and pleasure during pregnant sex. Your husband may enjoy massaging you, as well. Just make sure to wash it off after sex; oil tends to help bacteria flourish if you do not wash it off.
- Get a great bra as soon as you learn that you are pregnant. The Girls are going to feel much better if they are properly fitted and supported during pregnancy, and since they can be so sensitive (which can be a good thing), the better supported and comfortable they are, the less you will feel like making them off-limits for your husband during sex.
- Spend time on your hands and knees for twenty minutes, three times daily. Rock your pelvis toward the floor, and then toward the ceiling. Your body is going to develop all kinds of little aches as your pregnancy progresses because of the hormone Relaxin that is causing your joints to literally relax in preparation for the birth. Let your belly just hang there while you do this “pelvic tilt”. This is also a great position for sex with your husband when you are really getting big! He will probably enjoy the view of you doing all those pelvic tilts!
- Take a nice, warm (not hot) sitz bath with a cup of baking soda once daily (or more if you are suffering with more frequent yeast infections during pregnancy). This can really help. Some of us keep breastfeeding older children during pregnancy, and this causes a lot of soreness “down there”. Keep this at bay with these baking soda sitz baths. It’s also very relaxing before sex, and if you are sweating like a french whore in church like I am when you’re expecting, it is refreshing and your husband will appreciate it!
- Be aware that after that pukey first trimester is over, you are going to be one horny mama. Seriously. They don’t call it the “honeymoon trimester” for nothing, ladies. More blood flow to your nether regions and the ensuing hormone cocktail means you want it and you want it NOW! Take advantage of this phase, because when you are fuller and rounder, it will become more difficult and you will have to get creative with positioning.
- During the third trimester, unless you are restricted for medical reasons, try to have as much sex with your husband as you possibly can. It is great for preparing your body for labor. The semen helps soften the cervix to prepare for labor. The semen contains prostaglandins, which cause mild uterine contractions (you have probably already felt those Braxton-Hicks contractions to compare) and help prepare your uterus for the real deal soon. Orgasm can do the same for you – causing mild uterine contractions. But don’t worry if you are having issues having a Big O in the late third trimester; just tell your husband that all this sex is for HIS benefit and that of your new baby!
- All those vitamins are good for your hair, and your hair won’t shed during pregnancy – a great time to grow it out long if this is something your husband has wanted. Pregnancy hair = very, very sexy shiny, healthy, thick hair.
- There are some online sites for absolutely gorgeous pregnancy and nursing lingerie – sexy, too, not all matronly! This can be pricey; a low-cost sub my husband always found sexy was just naked, pregnant me – or me in a bikini, pregnant, cooking dinner…try it and see what your husband thinks.
- At some point, your belly is going to make it impossible for you to see your toes, much less your pubic hair…many husbands love to take over this portion of “wifely responsibility” at this point – see if your husband would find it sexy to give you a new ‘do down there. Nice foreplay and healthier than waxing during pregnancy!