Oh, be careful little ears what you hear…

Do you remember teaching your children that sweet song when they were pre-schoolers?

“Oh, be careful little ears what you hear,

Oh, be careful little ears what you hear,

‘Cause the Father up above 

Is looking down in Love,

Oh, be careful little ears what you hear.”

 

You can go on and on with other body parts:  eyes seeing, hands touching, feet walking…you get the idea.  I have never had a child learn the song that didn’t love it.

This is theology 101 for little children, but for those of us who were not raised in Christ-centered homes and families, it is good to really meditate on the truth of this simple song.  After all, the  Gospel should be so simple that a child can understand and obey!

In my last post, I was surprised to explore the extraordinary differences between men and women in health care situations, and surprised at some of my mindsets concerning the matter.  Particularly, I was surprised that I had accepted the societal norm (versus the Biblical norm) of opposite-gender care for intimate medical situations.  When my body reacted severely to a man’s touch and presence for obstetric care, I was unexpectedly shocked.  I caught myself feeling as though I were the “abnormal” one, when in fact, this is a perfectly natural and normal physiological reaction from even a woman who HASN’T suffered physical and sexual abuse!  After all, my body belongs to Col. T.

In any event, I began to ponder something simple.  Please be patient, and feel free to correct me here, because I am just beginning to flesh this out via the written word.  As we learn to think and behave in a counter-cultural way, God is going to be constantly teaching and guiding and correcting.

I believe that women are created by God to be “ones who receive” and “ones who submit”, and men are created by God to be “ones who send” and “ones who walk in authority”.  This is true of body, mind and spirit in each gender, and this is scriptural.

However, because we have strayed from God’s created order via feminist society, and because we have strayed from obedience to God’s commands in all other areas of our lives in secular society, we have created chaos.  

One area in which this has become increasingly clear to me is in the area of medical care.  I find it fascinating that one of the names of our Lord is The Great Physician, and yet there are so few physicians or other medical personnel today that even acknowledge this.  Somehow, they ignore The Great Physician, and the way He knit together the bodies of those whom they treat.  Somehow, their pride makes them believe that they are in control of God’s creation, when this is so very far from the Truth.

The issue that I see clearly is this:  opposite gender care from a medical provider opens the person being cared for to receiving incorrect messages and incorrect physical touches if the patient is a woman.  It opens her to receiving incorrect spiritual information into her spirit and heart as well, and we are commanded to guard our hearts!  Further, it opens her to obeying an authority other than her husband, if he is not physically present during her care, which is common. Cumulatively, this causes a disruption in peace in the woman because all of these things are contrary to her created nature.  

With men, because they are designed to be authoritative and hearing God and speaking His word, having dominion over creation, this same type of medical care by a female seems to usurp the very created nature of man!  As a patient, a man is suddenly under the authority of women (nurses, nurses aides, assistants, etc.) and even female physicians and medical students.  If he dare challenge this, he is ridiculed and shamed for desiring to uphold his masculinity and modesty. He loses his ability to have dominion.  He is vulnerable before women.  

I am grateful to a reader for sharing some website links that clarify this; apparently, this is quite an issue among God’s people who wish to pursue modesty.  Until recently, I had seen only female caregivers intentionally.  It was only after I found myself in dire need of a health care provider that I accepted a male caregiver as a Midwife, and discovered the gravity of this particular situation.  After my experience, it came to my attention that this is a man’s problem as well, and not just a women’s issue – my eyes have been opened!

My reader, WWW, says, in response to my statement that I literally felt weird and subsequently developed high blood pressure due to stress,  for feeling ill at ease with a male Midwife:

…And that is what the medical profession and their acolytes will play on: they will make you feel as though you are weak/abnormal for feeling the way you do. It’s even worse for men, since not only is the man put in a vulnerable and emasculating position, but if he objects, he is made to feel even less of a man for doing so, and hence emasculated further. And they wonder why men are notoriously reluctant to visit the doctor…

 

Nurses have traditionally been predominantly female, and this remains the norm, even in this feminist society.  Now that more Physicians are female, I am learning that more and more men are very, very uncomfortable seeing a female Physician due to modesty issues and the like.  

Note the following, which is  a comment made by a reader on a link sent to me via my reader WWW:

First off, I am a healthy 23 year old male. The flu had been spreading around my work so my boss offered to send all employees to the doctors office for preventative medication. I decided that it would be a smart move and made as appointment that day and went it. I politely informed the doctor right away that I was very uncomfortable around doctors, she acted like she had never heard this before and told be she was not going to take “attitude” from me. She then told be to take off all of my clothes. I told her I was not comfortable getting naked for her and asked her why such as intrusive physical was needed for preventative flu medication. She told be she was the doctor and my work was paying for it “so what should it matter.” She stated that I needed a genital and rectal exam or I could go somewhere else. I told her no again and she left the room, expecting that I would undress with her absent. I could hear her talking with the nurses out side the door about how rude I was. When she came in again I was still dressed, and she was visibly agitated by this. She was incredibly intrusive and disrespectful, but I got my way. A prescription with clothes on. My work wasn’t to happy to hear about my experience. Do not let doctors try and intimidate you into doing things that are both unnecessary and against your wishes.

– J ( Male ) From Tucson, az

 

Now, if a woman had complained like this, the whole Galaxy would have heard about it.  Yet, here is a man, suffering  humiliation at the hands of a health care practitioner, and this information was so obscure that I never would have located it on my own!  

However, that’s really not my main focus.  I realize we have a different set of “rules” in our society for men and women; we blog about it endlessly in the ‘sphere.  My main focus is to illustrate how the egalitarian views we have adopted in modern America have influenced such basic things as the care of our bodies by physicians and other health care professionals.

The Bible clearly says that our bodies are not our own:  they belong to God, as He created them for a temple for His Spirit.   If we are unmarried, we honor Him in modesty, purity and chastity with our bodies as His temple.  When we marry, we honor Him with fidelity to our spouse, and we further honor God by giving our body to our spouse – our body literally belongs to our spouse as we become one flesh in matrimony.

No wonder we feel something rising up in our spirits and even physical manifestations, such as my radically increased blood pressure the other day in the presence of my male Midwife.  We were not designed to be outside of the created order for our bodies, minds and spirits.  We are spirit beings, but we live in these fleshly bodies, and sometimes the only way we are going to sense a problem is when something comes into our body (through a spoken word, or a touch, or something we sense in another manner).  In my experience, it was the physical presence, physical touch during examinations and the spoken words of fear versus faith that alarmed my body and mind to a severe issue.  

Coming full-circle to the children’s song once more, we need to be very careful what we allow our five senses to receive as bible-believing women (and men).  Of course, we know this as Christians, but are we really thinking about this at all times?  Are we thinking about this when thinking of allowing ourselves to be vulnerable, and in a place of physical and even emotional submission to another person, other than our husbands?  Are you gentlemen thinking of how it is affecting your soul – your mind, will and emotions – to succumb to the will of a female in authority over you and your body?  Personally, I am becoming convinced that  these things are more serious than we realize and effect some of us more deeply than others, and therefore we should all guard ourselves vigilantly.

Ladies, I know (and you can read in my last post) that I literally felt “torn” emotionally between submitting to the will of a male Midwife, and submitting to the will and wisdom of my husband!  This is a terrible position, and I do not wish this for anyone.  I shed tears over this in the hospital, and felt fear, and a desire to please God.  Thankfully, I chose to listen to my husband, even though it meant (for me) signing out of the hospital almost nineteen hours earlier than the Dr. requested, and Against Medical Advice.  

Gentlemen, might I suggest that it would be uncomfortable at the least to feel that you must give of your body and modesty and surrender your will in vulnerability to a female in authority over you – a Doctor or other health care professional.  I know I was not surprised to read the stories of men who felt very violated by females in positions of authority over their bodies.  This ought not be.

We ladies need to be careful what we are receiving into ourselves, for as I said, we are made to receive.  It is dangerous to have body boundaries violated by anyone (health care professionals included) and it carries serious consequences for a wife.  Trust me on this one.

Thank you for considering this, and thank you my reader, WWW, for bringing this to my attention and allowing the Holy Spirit to use you in this way.  Comments, of course, are always welcome!

 

Blessings,

 

songtwoeleven

“For, lo, the winter is past, the rain is over and gone; The flowers appear on the earth; the time of the singing of birds is come, and the voice of the turtle is heard in our land.”

 

 

 

 

 

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19 thoughts on “Oh, be careful little ears what you hear…

  1. Oops, I meant “rededication,” not “red education.” LOL I guess that could sound like “red-pill education” hereabouts, eh?

  2. I have been reading this blog for several months now and the ideas and beliefs expressed here have really helped me to work to align myself more fully with scripture in my marriage. I recently had my marriage turn upside down–I believe as a direct result of my increased prayer and submission, even if in my eyes it was a very small change in me so far–and discovered that my husband has been hiding his porn addiction from me for our entire 7 1/2 year relationship. He is a liar and has been entirely deceitful to me. I am prepared however to work on our marriage for the long haul because of his confession and red education to the Lord, and because of the discussions I had been reading on “frivorce” in this arena. Anyway, my discovery of my husband’s sin came as a result of his sudden desire for oral sex, which he was very deceitful about, and which he now feels was ignited because of pornography. Instead of talking with me about it (though I’ve even asked him about it several times and have been open to talking about it) he decided to learn about it elsewhere. All of this is just to say that I am now even more interested to read the rest of your discussion with WWW on the matter of fellatio which appears to have been private. It sounds like his points are the very ones I have contemplated myself and it would be helpful for me in the future to articulate where I’m coming from to my husband when we come to a place where we’re ready to move forward in intimacy.

  3. This is an interesting take on oral sex. I have previously been of the mindset that, if one’s own husband desires fellatio, then a wife should pursue performing fellatio.

    Yes, this would appear to be the prevailing view on the manosphere.

    However, I do see your point of the more desirable act of PiV intercourse. But what if the husband is finding himself burning with lust because his wife cannot have as frequent a union with him in PiV intercourse as he would like?

    If she’s unable (rather than simply refusing him), then there are other means — mutual masturbation, “outercourse”, etc.. (I don’t wish to get too graphic.)

    I am not Catholic, but just this past year I first discovered that devout Catholics do not condone fellatio to completion, for it prevents the conception of a new life. This makes perfect sense to me. Maybe they’re onto something. Frankly, I never questioned what I was taught about Song of Solomon, wherein I was taught there are overt references to fellatio and cunnilingus.

    Neither am I Catholic, and I don’t follow Catholic teaching. I am, however very interested in the idea (which you yourself echoed) that God’s design reflects His intention — hence my remarks on oral sex. Again, don’t expect any support on this in the manosphere, though: fellatio is sacrosanct round here! 😉

    I think many Christian women (at least the wives I know) are so repulsed by their husband’s anatomy, not so much his semen…although I have heard that as well. When I say repulsed, I mean that they don’t even like LOOKING at their husband’s anatomy, and often shame him verbally for it, as though it were ugly.

    That’s just so depressing to read. I’m sure you don’t have such hang-ups. What is wrong with these wives? I too have heard women vocally trashing their men’s anatomy, too: some of them are utterly heartless (and some are shameless, too). Makes you wonder how they’d feel if the roles were reversed and their men were speaking like that about them…

    You’re a woman: tell me, how can other women be brought to see sense on this? It wrecks marriages. What’s your take on this vocal disgust women express about male anatomy and emissions?

    In theory, I suppose what I am saying is that I find it less of a problem that too many husbands are receiving fellatio (ha!) and more of a problem that many husbands are receiving NOTHING! Not even PiV intercourse! Their wives are disgusted, and this seems to be prevalent even in so-called Christian households.

    I know. It’s woeful. If only they’d just read the Bible and believe it, they’d find their lives transformed. But most churchgoers neither know their Bible nor really believe it.

    In any event, I will consider what you have said about the natural witness of the obstacles to many women enjoying giving fellatio to their husbands. Thank you for enlightening discussion!

    It’s been a pleasure (and thank you for correcting my comments — you did a perfect job!).

  4. I knew that the Word of God says that the traditions of men make the Word of God of none effect, but I didn’t truly understand the implications in everyday life.

    It’s amazing what you discover when you really start holding everything up to the light of God’s Word.

  5. That’s the whole point. If the profession were solely male then it’s likely that no one would even think twice about having to go to one, just like no one questions that you should go see a doctor if you broke a bone.

    Let’s just look at your reasoning here.

    Problem: Some people desire to preserve their modesty and thus seek same-sex intimate care, which is an inconvenience (and/or an irritation) for the modern medical profession.

    Solution: Abolish all choice, then these people have no option at all. Inconvenience dealt with. Patients’ wishes (and modesty) is irrelevant.

    This is more or less the Soviet approach to healthcare: you get what you’re given, so you’re spared the ‘problem’ of choice. From what you’ve written (twice, now), it would appear you think that, since you yourself are not bothered about patients’ modesty concerns, others should be forced to accept your own preference — by denying them all choice.

    Did you vote for Obama by any chance…? 😉

    I would also ask this question: do you believe that an individual has a right to determine who sees his or her naked body? Even if the prospective viewers are all accredited professionals? If so, then why adopt the position above?

    That’s a false dilemma there. Friendly mediocrity vs callous genius.

    No, you misunderstood me. I at no point stated that this was either-or, or that a good clinician cannot also have a friendly manner. I’m not presenting a false dilemma: I’m pointing out that clinical excellence is not the sole (or even primary concern) for many patients, and that many patients would gladly choose a poorer clinician who is of the same sex as they are over a better one who is of the opposite sex. Surely you can see this?

    You have no reason to feel ashamed of your nakedness if you have not sinned.

    BUT THAT’S THE POINT! We are sinful creatures and live in a fallen world. That’s why God showed us that we’re to wear clothes from the Fall onwards, and to cover our nakedness. Your reading of Scripture is actually upside-down on this. God wishes our nakedness to be hidden from the view of others.

    The main problem I have is that people are basing everything off of “feelings of being uncomfortable.” Well, most wives nowadays “feel uncomfortable” submitting to their husband. Do you see how this is a slippery slope?

    I see the latter as a slippery slope, but you are comparing apples and oranges, here. If you cannot see the chasm of difference between a woman’s feeling uncomfortable with Biblically mandated practice of wifely submission and a a woman’s feeling uncomfortable with the totally anti-biblical practice of a strange man’s viewing her naked body, then I pray that God opens your eyes. With the exception of the first two chapters of Genesis, nakedness before a stranger is always shameful in the Bible. Have you read through the Torah? The prophets? The Gospels? The epistles? Revelation? You can’t get through any of them without realizing that having one’s nakedness exposed is consistently A Bad Thing.

    Feelings should not play a part in the objective reality of the Scripture. This is why husbands are called to wash their wives in the Word. Because feelings can often lead you astray.

    Absolutely. …And Scripture itself is clear throughout that post-Fall nakedness IS shameful! Can you not see that your own feelings are the ones which need examining here? It was God Himself who instituted sexual modesty back in Genesis 3 by covering the nakedness of man and woman following the Fall. He did not strip off their fig-leaf aprons and tell them to chill out. Modesty is a solidly Biblical principle which has been under sustained attack for many years. It is ‘progressives’ (i.e. the immoral and godless) who have been urging us not to get “hung up on modesty” for years. Perhaps you consider yourself a progressive, I don’t know (though I do hope not). But whatever your views might be, it’s the pattern which God lays down for us in His Word which counts.

    Reserved for only the eyes of a spouse is reading into things. I haven’t read that anywhere in
    Scripture…

    Then I urge you to read the Scriptures right through, and reflect carefully on what you find therein. Clearly nakedness with one’s spouse IS permitted by God, since it is necessary for procreation. But nakedness before strangers (even before most of one’s family members) is consistently depicted as shameful. God frequently includes exposing people’s nakedness as a form of Judgement. …And a Biblical scholar will tell you that Israelite society was so modest that even references to someone’s being ‘naked’ in our translations are liable to mean simply that they had shed their outer garments, but retained an undergarment.

    Our society is radically immodest, and this is a huge problem for those who hold to a Biblical position on modesty (and even to secular folk who value their modesty and personal privacy) when it comes to seeking medical care. Such people are shamed for wishing not to expose their genitalia to a stranger of the opposite sex. Please, go and read some of the testimonies on the sites to which I linked. You’d need a heart of stone not to be moved (and angered) by these abuses of trust and position. The medical profession closes ranks on this issue and most in the field pay only lip-service to the idea of respecting patients’ modesty — they “talk the talk” (as it’s expected of them), but don’t “walk the walk”. You wrote before that you have some connection with the medical profession yourself: I implore you not to follow their lead in this, but to follow God’s heart on it.

  6. @songtwoeleven

    While I agree that the vast majority of physicians SHOULD be male (for the reasons you did indicate), I don’t believe that just cutting a line between genders is the solution. … it’s not that women in medicine is inherently WRONG – it’s that women, believing that they can have a career in medicine AND a traditional family is often wrong. For instance, if a woman knows that she is called to celibacy and a life of singleness, and she also knows she is called to serve God as a healer in medicine, why shouldn’t she? This woman I use as an example would be a rare woman, indeed, as the majority of women will have the God-given desire in their heart to marry and raise a family.

    This is a good answer: I remember reading this piece by Kevin Myers in which he was lamenting how high the drop-out rate was for female doctors in his country (the penultimate paragraph pretty much sums up the problem). We don’t need a fifty-fifty gender split in the medical profession (and it’s hardly desirable, anyway). Having a largely male medical profession doesn’t rule out same-sex intimate care: midwifery, obstetrics and gynaecology would be dealt with by women and anything involving male nakedness would be dealt with by men. Moves towards this would of course be fought tooth and nail; and even if it were implemented, the bureaucratic and chaotic environments in today’s large Western hospitals would still make things difficult. …But reform is always fought bitterly, and as God’s people we are to be ready for battle. We will probably not change the system, but we may well open a few minds and hearts.

    @STE, I read a couple of your comments on Sunshine’s blog, and was quietly appalled by the female doctor who was so vulgar as to wear a necklace in the form of a vulva between her breasts — a male doctor would soon be disciplined or ejected for coming to work with a phallus around his neck (or nestled above his butt-cleft). And you worked for this shameless freak? I can only imagine what that was like…

    The other comment of yours had some interesting links; one on how the presence of fathers prevents early puberty in girls and another on the effects semen has on female physiology. Unfortunately the latter was secular and its tone predictably trashy and shameless, but it is interesting to note that a wife reaps such benefits from absorbing her husband’s semen. And this quote of yours was right on the money:

    IMHO, Nature teaches us the ways of God. These are all natural witnesses to how God operates and His character and His relationship with us, and how He desires us to have relationship with one another.

    God says in His Word that He made all things “very good”. In the light of that, one has to ask; why then is semen so distasteful? No woman finds semen naturally pleasurable to consume. Its taste is bad. Its texture is most unpleasant in the mouth. …And then there’s the gag reflex… Yet women are determined to force themselves to ‘like’ it. Put simply, if God had intended us to have oral sex at all, then He really screwed up.

    Did God not foresee the body’s reaction to fellatio (and by extension, cunnilingus)? When He made penetrative sex so naturally appealing and pleasant for both parties, it is very telling that he put such obstacles in the way of oral sex. Our hook-up culture loves oral sex as it’s quick and dirty, and carries no risk of ending up ‘punished’ with a baby. The pagans through history have lapped it up (pun intended), depicting it in their ‘art’. And sadly many in the church go along with the culture on this (usually basing their argument on a single line of poetic imagery in Song of Songs). I think we need a rethink on this: if God created us and gave us “natural witnesses” to show us “how He desires us to have relationship with one another”, we should reconsider our position. …And that’s another thought which won’t be popular in the manosphere!

    Please note that I’m not saying that semen should be thought of as disgusting: on the contrary, a wife should find her husband’s semen precious and delightful — a great blessing from the Lord to provide her with the babies for which she longs (and, when absorbed into her vagina, to heal and balance her and bond her to her husband). But God ordained a natural use for everything. We should be careful to examine our practices to ensure that they are not against nature but are right in His eyes.

    • This is an interesting take on oral sex. I have previously been of the mindset that, if one’s own husband desires fellatio, then a wife should pursue performing fellatio.

      However, I do see your point of the more desirable act of PiV intercourse. But what if the husband is finding himself burning with lust because his wife cannot have as frequent a union with him in PiV intercourse as he would like?

      I am not Catholic, but just this past year I first discovered that devout Catholics do not condone fellatio to completion, for it prevents the conception of a new life. This makes perfect sense to me. Maybe they’re onto something. Frankly, I never questioned what I was taught about Song of Solomon, wherein I was taught there are overt references to fellatio and cunnilingus.

      I think many Christian women (at least the wives I know) are so repulsed by their husband’s anatomy, not so much his semen…although I have heard that as well. When I say repulsed, I mean that they don’t even like LOOKING at their husband’s anatomy, and often shame him verbally for it, as though it were ugly.

      In theory, I suppose what I am saying is that I find it less of a problem that too many husbands are receiving fellatio (ha!) and more of a problem that many husbands are receiving NOTHING! Not even PiV intercourse! Their wives are disgusted, and this seems to be prevalent even in so-called Christian households.

      In any event, I will consider what you have said about the natural witness of the obstacles to many women enjoying giving fellatio to their husbands. Thank you for enlightening discussion!

      blessings,

      songtwoeleven

  7. Wouldn’t this logic dictate that all OBGYN’s be female? Or should be female? I am curious, because being a doctor is traditionally a masculine profession, and for good reason. It takes years of school, years of practice, involves long hours and lots of stress. Not something that meshes well with motherhood. Or should female doctors be older women who are already done with the family life and then go back to school, etc.?

    • donalgraeme:

      I wondered about the dynamics of this, as well. As I am reading about medicine for women in biblical times, I am seeing that much of the healthcare was provided to women by female midwives: after all, this really encompasses much of women’s healthcare and there is no reason that the vast majority of women would need an additional male health care provider, even today. There are also excellent Nurse Practitioners today, who are very unlike physicians and more akin to midwives in the model of care they provide.

      Of course, there will be emergent situations without time to worry about a particular gender in the provider. Of course, there will be disease that might necessitate a female specialist. In modern society, we DO have women in many specialty fields as physicians.

      While I agree that the vast majority of physicians SHOULD be male (for the reasons you did indicate), I don’t believe that just cutting a line between genders is the solution. For example, I said to SSM that I consider myself a “traditionalist”, and she disagreed. As I began to think about this, she’s right: it’s not that women in medicine is inherently WRONG – it’s that women, believing that they can have a career in medicine AND a traditional family is often wrong. For instance, if a woman knows that she is called to celibacy and a life of singleness, and she also knows she is called to serve God as a healer in medicine, why shouldn’t she? This woman I use as an example would be a rare woman, indeed, as the majority of women will have the God-given desire in their heart to marry and raise a family.

      This, in my opinion, is different than the modern concept of affirmative action quotas for admittance to med school, and feminists’ rights to attend med school, and a certain percentage of women utilizing funds that could be used by men. Men, who would remain in medicine and dedicate their lives to medicine, as opposed to desiring to “go part-time” upon their marriage or the birth of their children.

      Of course, this requires a “perfect world”, and this is not where we live. Thus, for now, I would say that the most excellent way is to visit a physician or health care provider of one’s own gender to prevent the types of scenarios that I described in the OP. This does not mean that we will have a perfect experience with a provider of our own gender, either, but it certainly eliminates some significant modesty issues and psychological consequences.

      Thank you for reading and sharing!

      blessings,

      songtwoeleven

  8. A wonderful post: I’m glad you found those links helpful. Almost nobody is writing about this, yet there are so many good people (many of them believers) suffering silently and horribly — and essentially for lack of knowledge. There are few people who truly understand just how counter-cultural God’s Way is: He has told us beforehand that the whole world lies under the sway of the Evil One, and though we might nod in agreement, we just ignore this! God’s created order has been under attack since the beginning, and our modern society is just the latest iteration of its subversion.

    I really liked these two passages:

    The issue that I see clearly is this: opposite gender care from a medical provider opens the person being cared for to receiving incorrect messages and incorrect physical touches if the patient is a woman. It opens her to receiving incorrect spiritual information into her spirit and heart as well, and we are commanded to guard our hearts! Further, it opens her to obeying an authority other than her husband, if he is not physically present during her care, which is common. Cumulatively, this causes a disruption in peace in the woman because all of these things are contrary to her created nature.

    With men, because they are designed to be authoritative and hearing God and speaking His word, having dominion over creation, this same type of medical care by a female seems to usurp the very created nature of man! As a patient, a man is suddenly under the authority of women (nurses, nurses aides, assistants, etc.) and even female physicians and medical students. If he dare challenge this, he is ridiculed and shamed for desiring to uphold his masculinity and modesty. He loses his ability to have dominion. He is vulnerable before women.

    Your analysis is good and Scriptural. Today’s system is a perversion of God’s Way, yet because we’re living in the belly of the beast, we obey the system rather than testing it against Scripture. It’s also something that the manosphere is unlikely to touch because most in the manosphere are prideful and do not wish to show vulnerability or lose ‘frame’ (and today, a man who wishes to hide his nakedness from females is seen as ‘weak’), plus of course many oversexed men actually like to expose themselves to strange women: so don’t expect much support there (or from manosphere women married to such men). In fact, you may find that of those you speak to, it’s just you & “Col T” who acknowledge that there’s a serious problem! (Although there are a great many others who suffer in isolated silence over this, as those few who’ve looked into it have learned.) I praise God that you & your husband are of one mind here — it’s intimate stuff and it’s wonderful that your head shares your heart in this matter.

    If we are unmarried, we honor Him in modesty, purity and chastity with our bodies as His temple. When we marry, we honor Him with fidelity to our spouse, and we further honor God by giving our body to our spouse – our body literally belongs to our spouse as we become one flesh in matrimony.

    Yes. It’s so simple, really. Yet the message is constantly under attack — even from those who would claim to be Christians. Immodesty, impurity and unchastity are rife in the churches and yet anyone who laments these things is slammed as being ‘unchristian’: there is a new false gospel which runs something like, “God loves us all, so don’t judge” with the result that the churches are now full of people who are neither wise as serpents nor as harmless as doves — they have no discernment of evil and hence they go along with things which God detests.

    are we really thinking about this at all times? Are we thinking about this when thinking of allowing ourselves to be vulnerable, and in a place of physical and even emotional submission to another person, other than our husbands? Are you gentlemen thinking of how it is affecting your soul – your mind, will and emotions – to succumb to the will of a female in authority over you and your body?

    Exactly. …And there’s also the consideration of how our spouse (or future) spouse is going to be affected. On the very article to which I linked, for example, there was the following comment:

    “It is true that women can get aroused by seeing private parts of a man. There are many women who are uncomfortable with their husbands’ private parts being examined by a female doctor/nurse. There are not enough male nurses in some hospitals for male patients who are modest. I personally would never want my future husband to have any intimate procedures done by female doctors or nurses.”

    …and your husband was clearly not happy that another man was getting to see, touch and discuss your intimate parts — which as you say belong to him (just as his belong to you). A measure of jealousy is an integral part of a healthy relationship: it is soundly Biblical to want your spouse’s nakedness to yourself, rather than sharing it with others. Yet we are brainwashed to think that this is pathological; that it is unhealthy.

    Our society has become positively Huxleyan, ever more like his Brave New World wherein Biblical monogamy and commitment (and healthy jealousy) are denigrated and where people are raised to think that “everyone belongs to everyone else”. And it is a question of belonging: to whom does your body belong? Scripture says it belongs to God. And God has made His views plain. Of course, the world would not accept this, and would probably say that your body is your own. But even on this basis, if your body belongs to you (and to the spouse to whom you give it), then neither you (nor they) should be shamed by anyone for wishing to preserve its modesty — rather, those who seek to shame you for doing so should themselves be shamed for their conduct. But this generation’s understanding has been darkened by decades of rebellion against God and so everything is now backwards.

    I mentioned that I’d worked for a time in a care-related area, and that like you, I had witnessed what those in the caring/medical profession are like. And it runs right up the chain, now. For example, I remember being sent on a course, run by two men who were rather senior in their field (yet who were dressed more like a superannuated teenager and a drug-dealer), where I was one of only two male attendees in a gaggle of women. The tone was ultra-PC (feminist, left-wing, racially hypersensitive), and yet it was so lewd (I remember trying not to let my jaw drop when the course leaders, despite their feminist tone, cracked a ‘joke’ about how a dwarf could verify that a woman was a natural blonde; I also heard one of them rather loudly commenting on the genitalia of a male psychiatric patient with whom he’d been dealing: the women were little different, and I remember one got very angry because she thought — wrongly — that the course leader had commented negatively on the fact that she was fornicating). But PC is only superficial: it’s newspeak and doesn’t change the hearts of men and women. I ditched both the course and the job and resolved never to let any of my loved ones fall into the hands of these ‘carers’: in Biblical Israelite society, duties of care would be shouldered by family members, not by ‘professional’ strangers. I wish that as believers we too could help keep our family in Christ out of the hands of the increasingly shameless heathen (and, in the cases where medical care is required, to help our brothers and sisters in The Lord to retain their modesty and dignity).

    One final point: one of the other comments mentioned what it would be like if we’d stuck to traditional gender roles. It is important to realise that ‘traditional’ is not the same as ‘Biblical’, and is frequently in direct opposition to God’s teaching. Christians should have no time whatsoever for tradition simply for tradition’s sake, since Christ Himself had no time for such things and spoke damningly of men’s traditions. Tradition is only of merit if it lines up with Scripture, and the model of an elite class of male physicians wielding such power as they once did over women’s bodies is certainly not Biblical and therefore not Scriptural (again it’s something more Greek than Hebrew, and being grafted into Israel, we should aim to think like the latter, not the former). As I said earlier, expect little support on the manosphere with this one — but do seek to have your mind renewed by The Lord, through His wonderful Word…

    God bless, sister.

    • One final point: one of the other comments mentioned what it would be like if we’d stuck to traditional gender roles. It is important to realise that ‘traditional’ is not the same as ‘Biblical’, and is frequently in direct opposition to God’s teaching. Christians should have no time whatsoever for tradition simply for tradition’s sake, since Christ Himself had no time for such things and spoke damningly of men’s traditions. Tradition is only of merit if it lines up with Scripture, and the model of an elite class of male physicians wielding such power as they once did over women’s bodies is certainly not Biblical and therefore not Scriptural (again it’s something more Greek than Hebrew, and being grafted into Israel, we should aim to think like the latter, not the former). As I said earlier, expect little support on the manosphere with this one — but do seek to have your mind renewed by The Lord, through His wonderful Word…

      I don’t disagree with you here on the concept of “traditional.”

      So what exactly is this “weilding of power” that men would have over women’s bodies if all physicians were male?

      I don’t really get this. We know, generally, that the best in almost every field are males in regards to STEM and medical technology. I’m not sure why women would not want to be treated by the best physicians there are?

      In particular like OB/GYN used to be a male dominated profession within the physicians because they do the best work. You don’t have to be a woman to know how everything works and treat it correctly.

      However, I could see where a split field would make women (OF TODAY) feel more comfortable.

      Don’t get me wrong… as a physical therapist there are certain women’s health issues such as lymphedema from breast cancer which requires massage into the arm and breast region, and also pelvic floor incontinence issues where you have to insert objects into the vagina to retrain the pelvic floor muscles after pregnancy or prolapse. PT used to be primarily a female dominated profession so I could see these types of things being segregated or at least left to women.

      But I’m not sure where I see where you are coming from Biblically or Scripturally here. It’s not about “weilding power” over women’s bodies. It’s about medical care. Men generally rise to the top. Therefore, it’s more likely the best medical care will be provided by a man.

  9. You know, I always wondered what would’ve happened if the more traditional gender roles had continued.

    For example, mid-wives were almost always female. There would be no male mid-wives and this wouldn’t be a concern at all.

    The medical doctor profession used to be all male while nurses used to be for the most part female.

    I doubt anyone would have any complaints when they know they’re going to get the same gender and can’t request a different one because it would be what it would be.

    But the fact that we can choose more now along with people being in general more rude and self centered has caused tons of issues.

  10. “Oh, be careful little ears what you hear.”

    My little ears heard someone screaming that their vagina could do anything today. I don’t think there’s any recovering from that.

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